Blue Christmas

Sometimes I miss my mom so much my heart aches.  Mostly I am fine, and I have many good memories and I share them and I am fine. But sometimes, like tonight it sneaks up on me and I am not fine.

Tonight started off well enough, cookie sampler social at church, then a candlelit family service. I enjoyed seeing so many familiar friendly faces.  Then we went to my in-laws for a traditional red & green enchilada dinner. A coworker joined us and that was nice. Then after dinner was over we headed home.

Then I saw my friend Texas Jay posted a lovely tribute to his mom on FB and I teared up, couldn’t help it, although I tried. Then my sister Jenni was texting me, and she is really missing my Mom tonight and that was pretty much it. I have been crying on and off since then.  

Here is the thing. I miss her so much that it hurts me sometimes.  She might not have been the best mom, but she was the best mom for me.  It does not feel fair that she has been gone so long, and that so much has happened that she missed. And why tonight? Why Christmas eve when I should be wrapping presents or drinking eggnog or kissing Kathleen under some mistletoe.  I really don’t have those answers.

So I went looking for a picture of my Mom and Jenni and I to share.  I can’t really find the one I want, and mostly I think that is because all my photo albums are still in Colorado, instead I found this picture.  I like this picture because of what you don’t know.  My Mom had come to Oklahoma to see us and while she was here she decided she needed to get her hair trimmed. So I made her an appointment with the woman who cut my hair, who tried to persuade my mom to cut her hair short.  My mom declined, having had short hair for years.  And so my mom got what she later referred to as big Texas hair.  It was big, and blow dried, and teased and back combed and really really big.  You can’t see it in this picture because of course she went home and brushed all the product out of her hair and did her best to make it look like normal person hair.

That mental image of my mom with great big Texas church lady hair is what I am holding on to tonight, what is bringing me my cheer tonight.

Merry Christmas.  Do me a favor? Love each other. 

Nutcracker Sweets

Tuesday night we went to see the Nutcracker at the civic center.  We have been meaning to go all season, after all Emily Thompson is in It this year. For those of you playing along at home Emily is the daughter of our friends Tom and Jodi Thompson. Yes,that Jodi Thompson.  Emily is all grown up at 18 and an apprentice ballerina with the OKC Ballet.  I am proud of her, so I can’t even imagine how proud Tom and Jodi are.

I meant to go earlier in the season but we were busy, and had party prep, and suddenly we had run out of nights. So we went Tuesday, the last night, and were joined by Jodi, who either is such a fan of mine, or such a fan of her daughter that she wanted to see another performance.  My boys have not been to the ballet before, and I wasn’t certain how they would enjoy it.  Also I had some concerns about their attire.  I left some instructions about what I thought they should wear, but they don’t always listen to me. They did ok, even though they did not exactly follow my instructions. At least I assume they did ok, Jodi didn’t say anything about their attire, so I think we were safe.

Remember the last time I went to see the nutcracker? I tend to sleep through the Snowflakes. This year though, Em was a snowflake so I knew going in I needed to be awake for that part. I drank a 5 hour energy on my way, so I figured I would be ok.  Let’s just say that at least I was awake for the important parts.

So how was the Nutcracker? Well, since we were primarily interested in seeing Emily dance, this version of the Nutcracker is the story of a young woman who goes to a fancy Christmas party in a fabulous dress with several children, probably not her own since she is so young. I am thinking second wife. Not a home wrecker though, probably the first wife was an evil queen.

After the party there is a lovely snowstorm with dancing snowflakes.  I liked it when it snowed on the stage, I thought that was very clever.  And yes, I did stay awake for that part! Yeah me.

At the close of the second act there are dancing flowers. Some other stuff happens in between, But mostly that was the important part.  Also, since the whole ballet is about Em, it seems like bad staging not to have her front and center where it would have been easier for people to see her. Just a thought.

And no, for those of you wondering, I did not jump up and yell EMILY! I KNOW HER! I KNOW HER! Every time she came on.  I am not saying I wasn’t tempted to, but discretion and valor and all that.

Party recap part one.

This year’s party is over, done with, and on the books. It certainly goes down as a memorable one.

Ordinarily I say don’t reveal what the plan was, only what the results were, focus on what went right, not what didn’t get done. I am making an exception tonight only because so many things fell short of the goal. Sigh.

So I was an hour late to the party, for starters. After setting up, (for HOURS longer than anticipated) the boys and I went home to get Kat, then to Nolen & Elisa’s to get food, then drop everyone off at the venue. Then I took Matthew and his friend Brittney to collect his friend Romeo and get the eggnog. That is when I realized that I had left the punch ladles at home. I had to stop at the store and purchase soup ladles to serve beverages with.  In the mean time, Kat made the punch wrong (totally not her fault).

Also, we had no ice. Who has a party without ice?  The white wine wasn’t chilled.  We forgot the champagne.  Even though the dessert table was lovely with the silver serving platters and bowls, Kat felt it was bare in comparison to the savory tables. 

I forgot, again, to take pictures of the centerpieces, but luckily Katie Powell remembered and did an amazing job.  But I forget to get a family picture, or at the least a picture with Kat. Sigh.

So, with all that went wrong, how was the party?

Kathleen says that Christmas doesn’t begin for her until the party.  What I learned this year is that, like Christmas, it is going to come anyway. It will come without chocolate covered pretzels; it will come without pictures, without ladles, without ice, without champagne. It came without ribbons, It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags…Then I thought of something I hadn't before. What if Christmas… doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more?

A helping hand.

How do you know when you need help? Sure when you are dangling from a cliff by the tips of your fingers you need help but how about when you started down the trail? Or when you got the edge of the cliff to look over? Or when you leaned out to take the perfect selfie? At any point someone could have stepped in and given you some help before it was too late.

If you read the blog, or know me at all you have hear me mention our friend Heather.  We know Heather from college, she was in many of my Spanish classes with me, and she and Kat had many we should be studying giggle fests.  After College Heather moved to Austin, but in 2001 she moved back to OKC and became a more or less constant part of our lives.  In fact, when I was traveling for work most of 2010 and 2011 Heather stayed with us and was a huge help to Kathleen.

But this is not about that.  This is about party prep 2009.  It was bitterly cold, the Friday before the party and I had reached the “This house will never be ready” stage, Kat was at “No one is coming and there won’t be enough food!”  About noon there was a knock on the door, and there was Heather.  “I thought you could use some help.”

The thing is, very few people can help.  It isn’t easy to step into the kitchen with Kathleen and work alongside her without being more in her way than helpful. But Heather is one of those people.  We had lunch, then Kathleen and Heather rolled truffles, and bonbons, made cookies, and that last minute batch of fudge. Sometime before dinner Heather was the angel that helped our tired brains figure out what serving dishes we needed to serve the food for the party, and cleverly labeled them with post its to avoid confusion.   She worked tirelessly, and was in such good spirits and so quick to laugh, it made the work enjoyable.  The later it got Heather even said she had her nightgown in the car and could take a catnap on the couch so we could get an early start, but thankfully, with her help we wound down around 2am. 

Heather is back in Owasso where she grew up. With her family, who, I am sure, are delighted to have her there.  I don’t completely hate her family for that, Just maybe a tiny bit.  You see there have been so many times this week as we are crazy preparing for things that someone has said, “That’s a Heather thing,” only to realize someone is going to have to suck it up and do it ourselves.

When I tell Heather that she is our favorite, I might not be kidding.

Not a Christmas Party Picture

On Wednesdays we wear Pink

Things you absolutely must do if you are me and getting ready for our Christmas party.

Take 3 days off work to get things done.

Sleep in and then jump out of bed and freak out about how much you still need to do.

Make very specific plans for the decoration of the party venue that are a) completely unrealistic in terms of budget, b)unrealistic time wise, c) most likely guaranteed to be a #PinterestFail

Then you must drag all three boxes labeled SILVER into the living room, open the smallest box and carefully polish all the small pieces contained therein. Realize that you do not particularly care for the type of silver polish you purchased at Target.

Once you have finished the first box, decide that you need to take a break and work on your Christmas blog because you are already 5 days behind.  Get distracted by facebook. Declare that you are EXHAUSETED and take a tiny nap.

Wake up and scurry around to get ready for Wednesday night church. Wait for your oldest son to get ready.  While waiting, unpack the other two boxes labeled silver, leave the packing paper all over the living room floor. Stack the tarnished silver on top of one of the sealed tubs that holds Kathleen’s packing containers for caramel and truffle orders. Get a little worked up because the silver punch bowl isn’t in any of the boxes labeled SILVER.  Leave for church in a hurry because you are now late.

Eat too much at dinner because you do not understand portion control. Then you absolutely must apologize to Sarah because 1. Someone was over an hour late to retrieve my teenagers from her home last weekend (because the boys gave bad information and then stopped responding to texts and calls) and 2. One of the boys criticized the enchiladas she made for them because she used flour tortillas instead of corn.  At least he didn’t say “Depth of Flavor.”

Then you absolutely must visit the nursery on the second floor, because even though you do not work in the nursery on Wednesdays, those are the babies in your Sunday school class on Sundays. Also, it is fun to watch them run amuck. Amuck! Amuck! Amuck!

Go the gym and watch the pastor play basketball with the youth.  Watch My Paul run the skate room and be friendly to visitors and little children, even though you know he is grumpy.  Wish your phone held a better charge. Make plans with my Matthew to go shopping when you get home.

Because it is Wednesday it is IMPERITIVE that you get ice cream on the way home.  But First, you must go to Harkins to get my Paul’s weekly work schedule.  This was the BIG schedule… the one that he has been waiting since he got hired for.  And the verdict is… He does not have to work opening night of Star Wars The Force Awakens. Oh, also he is off work on Christmas Eve.

Then you must must must stop by Nicole’s house with an order of fudge for her to send to her family.  Do not forget to invite her for Christmas Eve Dinner. Even if she is catholic.

Stop at Braums for the ice cream you are dying to have, because you are in DESPERATE need of refreshment. Even though you overate 5 paragraphs ago. Ask the drive through window person “what’s good?”. Then make him recite the holiday flavors. Order an eggnog ice cream cone. Decide that you would rather have it in a cup, but don’t let anyone change the order, tell them all you will suffer in silence. Sigh loudly, so they know your suffering won’t be silent.

Get home and throw yourself on the couch because you are exhausticared from all this running around. Wait on Matthew to eat something so you can make your late night run to the store. When he is finally ready, it is important that you make a big deal about the list, and the importance of the list, and following the list.

Under cover of darkness, and wearing disguises so no one recognizes you. Allegedly. Covertly and discreetly drive to Wal-Mart and get the 10 things on the list. Also purchase  red and green M&Ms for the party because no one got them the other day.  Realize no one put candy covered pretzels on the list either, but refrain from purchasing those.  Hunt high and low for the silver polish at Wal-Mart, because that other stuff is Crap.  Find the kind you like. Wright’s Silver Cream. Ask yourself if you are possibly the only person polishing silver anymore.

Return home, put crap away, go back to polishing silver. Cuss. Make up some bad words about how much you dislike polishing silver. Post on facebook about it.  Take a break to look for that damn silver punchbowl that you are certain you have seen since moving, but refuses to be found.  Go back to polishing, even though clearly the party is ruined without the silver punch bowl. Decide that you hate polishing silver and that it is the worst. 

Tell Kathleen how much you hate polishing silver and that you are considering throwing away her silver tea pot and purchasing her a new one on eBay for $20 because that is easier.  Decide that now is the perfect time to try that thing you keep seeing on pinterest with tinfoil and hot water and baking soda.  Realize that it is after 1am and that it might be too late to try this. Do it anyway.  Be really surprised that it works, mostly.  Do 2 bigger pieces this way, and a handful of silverware.

Then when it is almost 3 am you simply MUST go to bed because you have things to do in the morning.

Sweet Baby Cheeses

If today is the 15^th and I have only posted 10 entries this month that means I am 5 days behind? Yikes.  Matthew was just asking me to watch a YouTube video from Lady Leshurr (Queen’s speech Ep. 1-4) and I told him I needed to work on the blog, he told me to blog on my own time.  On. My. Own. Time? Not to get all LL Cool Jay with him, but Mama said knock you OUT!  When is it my own time around here?!?  I sit down to blog, then I get up and check on Paul and make sure he’s getting ready for bed.  Then I sit back down, only to jump up and help Kat wrap caramels.  I go back to the blog and Matthew needs something for his cough.  I try and go back to the blog and then Kat needs someone to find packaging for the rum truffles.  I go back to the blog, and Paul can’t sleep and needs someone to scratch his back.  My own time, indeed.

Not that I am complaining about these other diversions, because I love my family and I am grateful for every minute I have with them, but honestly My Matthew’s sass mouth? It must come from his mother.

What are your families special holiday traditions?  Things your family does that mean holidays to you?  Tonight was a very special night for my family; the traditional party shopping trip. I don’t think anyone loves to go to Sam's Club, and I am not saying I do, but there is something fun about the whole family shopping for our party together.  It is a highly organized goal driven team exercise.

We walk into Sam’s with a list. This list is very specific and it is important to note that we never deviate from this list. Ever.  So tonight brie was not added to the list, and neither was tzatziki dip.  We also never get tempted by the people sampling things.  So it was not Paul you saw with the pretty girl sampling lotions and creams that are safe for his eczema skin.  Definitely not.

It is important to note that Kat and I are very specific when we make the shopping list.  We try every year to come up with a balanced menu and some years certain food items get culled in the spirit of a cohesive, thoughtful, balanced menu.  No one ever ignored the menu and just tosses a 20 lb ham in the cart because he likes ham and thinks we should have it at the party. *Cough* Matthew *Cough*.

Thriftiness is also a valued part of our tradition. This is why someone spent 25 minutes with 3 members of Sam’s management tonight discussing the disposable plate options.  While I appreciate some of the high end options, I needed them to understand that 33 cents a plate is on the pricey side and that people will use multiple plates.  It took them a while, but after I gave them an unbiased opinion of their ugly 8 cents per plate option they helped me come up with an option that I didn’t hate that meets my standards. (Let’s not even have the discussion of why we are using disposable plates when we own a sufficient amount of party sized holiday plates, unless you want tears and loud words. You come up with a way to transport 260 dirty party plates home and wash them in an apartment sink).

You know what else says Holiday Tradition to my family? The phrases “Do people even like celery? I don’t, so I just assume other people use it as means to eat dips and stuff” “Just put the Brie in the cart, woman” “Is 18lbs of meatballs enough? Do we need 24lbs? Maybe 30lbs?” “Why is it taking him so long to find the crackers, they are right there, I can see them from here!” as well as the inevitable “Oh crap we forgot…”

So while we are already home working on the list of stuff we still need, I did enjoyed our evening at Sam’s and the traditional hot dog dinner.  Merry Merry.

Tap Tap Tap for Joy

Today was the 3^rd Sunday of Advent, Rose Sunday, the Sunday of Joy, so I wish you Joy.

Today our children’s choir and what my Matthew calls the “little kids choir” aka the nursery choir sang in the service.  I love, Love LOVE when the children perform during the worship, because you never know what will happen. And something unexpected always happens.

When my Paul was in grade school they used to have their performances on Wednesday night.  I think the first year he was in choir was the year his buddy Aaron kept pulling his turtleneck up and showing the crowd his belly, I mostly missed that because Paul was so nervous he couldn’t stop scratching his head, both hands vigorously scratching his head during the whole performance, as though he had flees.  For the record, he did not have flees. We had him checked. (Ok I am kidding, he has pretty bad eczema, and once he starts scratching, he can’t stop). 

I don’t remember if it was that year or the next year that my Matthew was in the little kids choir and only he Gracie showed up so they choir teachers elected not to have them perform. Those two were so MAD. Gracie was just going to get up and sing a song of her own composition, and Matthew suggested he could just get up and break dance.  I am not sure how Miss Kristin talked them out of that. I often regret that she did.  There is no telling what we would have gotten to watch.

So today, when the little kids got on stage, of course they forgot what they had practiced just a few minutes before, so there was plenty of herding those littles into place.  Just before they started singing, one of the little girls banged the hard heel of her dress shoe on the wood stage.  It made a nice loud tap dancing style noise.  You should have seen the smile on her face.  I imagine her inner dialogue went something like this “Wow I like that noise, it was loud.  Did anyone else hear that noise?  Let me try that again and see… Why is Miss Kristin making that sour face at me? I am just going to keep making this loud noise with my shoe while we sing it is so much fun!” When the singing was over she banged her heel a few more times, just for funsies.

So far this was the best Sunday morning service this Christmas season.

Festive Attire

Sweet baby cheeses there are only 9 days left before the party.  10 days people.  I haven’t polished any silver, I haven’t made any wreathes, I haven’t decorated any trees, I haven’t made a single cookie.  Kathleen, is it too late to cancel?

Lucky for those on the invite list Kat always says yes it is too late to cancel.

So here we are, instead? of preparing for the party I am blogging after a way too long day at work.   

What am I thinking about? What I will wear to this party.  See, I had the boys outfits worked out a while ago, (although Matthew isn’t sold on his outfit). I am just trying to figure out what I want to wear.

So, just for the record, I thought I would review what I have worn for the last 25 years and see what I can come up with.  Our photo albums are still in Colorado so I am doing this from memory. Be impressed with my ability to recall minutiae.

1991- Dark grey sweats and a grey sweater with huge red polka dots. (No I am not making that up)

1992- Black slacks, Black tuxedo shirt, black cropped tuxedo jacket.

1993- Black slacks, white shirt, black velvet vintage vest (Paul wore the same vest in 2008, and                     Matthew wore it last year)

1994- black slacks, black silk shirt.

1995- black slacks, green tuxedo shirt, black silk vest. (Paul wore the shirt in 2009)

1996- black slacks, black silk shirt.

1997- black slacks, black banded collar shirt with a jeweled top button on the collar, black cowboy               boots.

1998- hounds tooth slacks, white banded collar shirt from Banana Republic

1999-black slacks, black shirt

2000-black slacks, green sweater.

2001-black slacks, blue shirt, silver vest (what happened to that vest?)

2002-black slacks, black shirt

 2003-black slacks, dark grey shirt.

2004- black slacks, green tuxedo shirt, silver cufflinks.

2005-navy slacks, green shirt

2006-white shirt, black sweater vest, black slacks, red tie.

2007-black shirt, khaki pants

2008-Red heather dress shirt, navy slacks.

2009- black slacks, black and white pinstriped shirt, wine colored silk tie

2010-grey slacks, grey shirt

2011-grey slacks, white shirt, grey tie, green v-neck sweater.

2012-red slacks, grey shirt

2013-Red slacks, black shirt, black cardigan, red tie

2014-grey plaid slacks, white shirt, grey vest, red bowtie, black wingtips with red shoe laces

This was actually harder than I thought.  Some years I can vividly remember what Kat wore, or what Paul wore, but what I wore is somewhat foggy.  I guess we will have to wait until someone with better memory than me shows up, or I get the photo albums back from Colorado to see what years I was wrong about.

What’s the point of this exercise? Do I have any clarity about what I want to wear next weekend? No, but hey, I seem to favor the black shacks and black shirt look right?

Merry Christmas from Johnny Cash!

Never Luke Back

What is your family’s favorite holiday TV special?  My Matthew loves White Christmas and I suspect that my Paul’s favorite is The Christmas Story. “You’ll shoot your eye out!” Of course we do love the Peanut’s Christmas special, but trying to get everyone to agree on one to watch together is never easy.

Tonight I thought we could watch something as a family while I tried to finish up the blog entry I didn’t post last night, (yes I know, I am now two days behind).  Paul flipped the TV on and discovered the original Miracle on 34^th Street was on AMC.  He was interested in watching, but Matthew was NOT.  I suggested to Paul that Matthew is not a fan of classic movies. Of course his fondness for White Christmas proves the lie to this statement.  I suggested the Great Holiday Baking Show with Mary Berry for Kathleen, but no one else seemed interested.

Things were about to go to blows when I remembered that I have the best, the most amazing, most classic family Christmas special saved on the DVR.   Away to the TV I flew like a flash! Boom! I hit play and there it was… like a Christmas miracle, the Modern Family Express Christmas episode.  I don’t know if you are a fan of the TV show Modern Family or not, but this episode is full of everything that is Christmas.

Watch this clip and be amazed at the comedic genius that is Sophia Vergara. No seriously look. I mean LOOK. But never look back, never. 

Jolly & Vintage

I am Loving these vintage style Christmas card images.  I take no responsibility for creating these images, I just appropriated them off the interwebs to share them here.  

Loving the scotty dogs in this picture.  Reminds me of Scuddar & Zandor,my Mom and Dad's scotty dogs.

You just know this Christmas Beauty is just as sassy as she is cute.

Because of course Santa takes a ferris wheel.

Brrr... because everyone needs a white fur hat in winter,

Did anyone else see Victoria Beckham's instagram post this week? sitting on a ladder in heels decorating her tree?

and this vintage hipster family watching tv wearing suits.  #SuitUp

Sweet Christmas Kitty!

This may look like a vintage picture but actually it is Jodi Thomas Thompson picking up some last minute gifts. 

Santa says ho ho YES!

This is absolutely what my sister Jenni looked like just before she sat in the enchiladas

Merry Christmas, and to all a good night!

Christmas cheesecake

My family went to Santa Fe to see my Dad and siblings for Thanksgiving.  While we were there my boys had much fun with their cousins.  They helped my dad replace the swings on the swing set in the yard and took turns pushing the little ones on the swings.  They really love their cousins.  At dinner Keenan and Naomi were asking me if I was going to tell them stories about their mom.  I have shared a few already on the blog.  There was this one, about when my sister Jenni had her own Christmas tree.  There was this one too, about a red velvet skirt.  Also there was the time Jenni and my Mom surprised me for Christmas, (I'd post a link, but I can't find the entry)

I have another one I am going to share tonight.  I hope Jenni reads this to them.  Even though I don’t get to see Keenan, Naomi, and Christian very often I love them fiercely and they benefit from all the practice I have had being an uncle to Elisa Gail, Scott, Rachel, & Julia Beth.  I hope they remember that when I wind up in a home and need someone to sneak me in alcohol.

When my sister Jenni was 17 (the same age as my Paul is now) she had her first job that wasn’t babysitting, or helping out at Desert Spring Children’s Center.  Jenni was “the phone girl” at Pizza 2 Go near the University of Arizona in Tucson AZ.  She had filled out an application and never heard back, so she would go in and ask the manager if he had hired anyone yet. He would tell her no, and she would remind him she had turned in an application and that she was ready to work.  She kept up with this weekly until she wore him down and they hired here to answer the phones and take orders.  She made whatever crappy pay they could get away with paying her, and the drivers were supposed to share tips with her but they did not.  Also, the college age boys that worked there with her called her “phone girl” and refused to call her by her name.  But Jenni did not quit, she kept going to work, and she worked hard and was good at her job, and she did not let the teasing of the pizza guys bother her.  When they gave her a nametag, she put “phone girl” on the nametag.

There was one other female working at Pizza 2 Go, and that was the young woman who made the cheesecake.  In addition to late night pizza cravings, sometimes college students want something sweet, and P2G offered cheesecake.  The pizza guys teased her too, and called her “cheesecake” and, predictably, the cheesecake chef got tired of it and quit in December.  My sister thought about, and asked the manager if she could have the job as cheesecake chef, because it paid better.  The manager, and the other employees said ”oh no, what do you know about making cheesecake, you are just the phone girl.”  My sister said, “I may just be the phone girl, but you will run out of cheesecake in a day or two and I don’t think you have any other options.”  They told her that they needed her on the phone, taking orders, not making cheesecake.  My sister Jenni told them about this new invention called a headset where she could talk on the phone and use her hands for something else.  Although this did take place in the 1990’s it wasn’t really a “new” invention.

So, right before Christmas the manager agreed to give Jenni a chance to be the cheesecake chef.  Everyone was pretty sure she would screw it up, after all she was just the phone girl and had never made cheesecake before.  What those arrogant jerks didn’t realize was that the recipes were all written down and left where Jenni could read them.  Pretty soon she was making cheesecakes and answering the phone and making twice the money.  So the boys decided to change her nickname to “cheesecake girl”, but my sister Jenni wasn’t having it.  She told them to call her “Cheesecake Chick”.

The moral to this little Christmas story for my niece and nephews is to know your worth.  It is easy to get discouraged and feel run down, especially when arrogant pizza boys make fun of you, but when you know how wonderful and precious that you are, you have the strength to make other people see it too.

Joy and Delight

Today was the second Sunday of advent, so I wish you peace.

This morning in Sunday school as Sandy and I were starting the lesson, (you do know I teach Sunday school right? In the nursery where the usual lessons are #1 Jesus loves you, #2 do not pee on Mister Judson), Sandy says today’s lesson is about Zechariah. I was a little foggy on Zechariah, I mean just a few weeks ago we had Balam’s talking donkey so you never know.  I asked if Zechariah was the old dude who waited at the temple like forever for Jesus to be born.  But no, it turns out Zechariah was the father of John the Baptist and the husband of Elizabeth.

So the story is about how Zechariah was an old guy, a really old guy, well past his prime, and an angel shows up and tells him he is going to be a father.  Actually what he says was ““Do not be afraid, Zechariah; your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you are to call him John. He will be a joy and delight to you, and many will rejoice because of his birth”

Have you ever wondered why the angels always show up and say “Do Not Be Afraid?” I mean maybe the angels could try a little less sneaking up and surprising people? Or maybe the word got around after the angel wrestled that one dude all night and busted his hip.  So no wonder people were scared, they thought the John Cena of the angelic host might show up and bust their hip.  But, I digress.

Here is the part I like, the angel said “he will be a joy and a delight to you”.  This was John the Baptist they were talking about, a man who earned his fame for eating honey and crickets and wearing goat fur in the desert. (you know, other than the whole baptizing people and preparing the way for Jesus). Sounds delightful right? But again, that is not really the point.

The angel said Zechariah’s son would be a joy and a delight.  My boys gave me lots of joy and delight until they learned to talk.  It has been a struggle since then.  But sometimes, I get glimmers of joy and delight.  This week I mentioned on facebook that I found all my serving utensils for the Christmas party.  What I did not mention was that they were in the back of one of the silverware drawers all together.  When Matthew organized the kitchen drawers he put them there.  I asked if he did it so we would know where they were when it was party time, but he had another reason.  Paul does not like eating with real silver silverware, the doesn’t care for that metallic taste in his mouth, so Matthew basically sequestered all the silver silverware in the back of the drawer so no one grabs it by mistake.  He did this without prompting, or request, but just because he was thinking of his brother.

When I picked Paul up at midnight from work and brought him home tonight he was making plans for the Christmas party. Big plans. Secret plans that you will have to wait to find out.  In addition to that we were discussing that this week we need to buy him another pair of black pants for work since he is down to only one pair.  He announced that he was planning on using his own money for that, and that he figured he would buy Matthew a pair of pants too.  Again, not prompted or requested, but just because he was thinking of his brother.  That gives me great joy and delight.  

not so silent night

I did not post an entry last night.  I know this is worrisome because last year I failed spectacularly and only did 19 days.  I am not talking about that yet.  The truth is last night when we got home I was worn out and went straight to bed.   My plan is to post twice today. Let’s see how that goes.

Last night was the children’s Christmas party at church.  This is what Kathleen had to say about it.

Merry, tired, but Merry! …merriment is a gaggle of Sunday school children making 'gingerbread' nativity scenes with marshmallow sheep and tootsie roll donkeys. They consumed more chocolate frosting than they applied as mortar on their graham cracker stables. They were loud. They made crafts and followed stars around church seeking the manger. They wore me out...merrily. I can still smell the chocolate. It might be in my hair. Chocolate smeared kiddos ...merry.

Here is what I know, there were about 200 children last night, age 1 to 12.  Also there were 30 monkeys, 15 donkeys, 8 hyenas, 4 elephants, 2 clowns and a partridge in a pear tree.  To say it was loud is like saying close is a lingerie store without windows. 

Kathleen’s project was to build life sized mangers out of graham graham crackers held together with a chocolate butter cream, the wishes and dreams of children, and angel kisses.  No easy task when those 300 children were just as likely to pipe the chocolate butter cream into their mouths as they were to use it as mortar to hold the structures together. Then there was coconut to use as straw, I am not going to lie, I am judging the kids who refused to use the coconut.  Where is baby Jesus going to sleep? On the cold hard ground? Santa is probably going to bring them coal.

Then there was some other crafting with marshmallows and black licorice.  You know who likes black licorice? No one. Well. Maybe those dwarves who live under the front porch, but they also like earwax so I don’t exactly value their taste palates.

Following the edible nativities (because who doesn’t love eating caramel donkeys and peanut butter cup angels?) there was a plastic perler bead and pam spray craft. Have you ever made bowls with 400 children?  Unless you are Karen McWilliams I don’t think you have.  It really made a bowl, although I was doubtful the whole time. Following that there was a ‘follow the star’ activity where all 500 children traipsed through the church looking for stars and loudly calling the names of their favorite bible characters. “On Dasher” “On Dancer” “On Zayn” “On Liam”.  Seriously I think someone needs to talk to whomever teaches Sunday school to these children.

At the end of the star search it was narrowed down to two finalists. The bad boy with a heart of gold versus the girl with a voice of an angel. Wait, no, wrong story, at the end of the search was a giant nativity set up in the star room with glow in the dark stars on the ceiling.  I told the children that the straw in the nativity was coconut.  Have you ever eaten straw? Well I know 20 or so kids who have.  Good news is no one was allergic.

Finally, FINALLY, all 600 children went upstairs to the WOW room to watch a video. It was the only time all night that it was finally quiet. I love quiet children…ok, truth Is I love loud children too, but wow were these kids loud.  When the parents came to get their precious bundles it felt like it must be 2 am or something, but no…only 10pm.

Kat and I had given our boys a choice between coming and helping or going to the movies.  I am as shocked as the rest of you that the boys opted to go to the movies.  The boys second movie wasn’t done till 11:45pm so we went and had adult beverages and late dinner while we waited.  It was so quiet in the restaurant.  Sigh, a mini Christmas miracle.

A little Christmas truth.

I think I have shared that my boys do not believe in Santa.  Kat grew up a non believe and I compromised as a way to appease her on the Christmas tree issue. (Remind me to tell you about the first year I did a Christmas tree with her).  This means we also eschew the whole elf on the shelf thing.  I have also recounted how challenging it was to convince my Matthew that it was not his job to tell his friends “the truth”

Last night at church a friend was saying that she cannot find her elves this year.  She has two children; a boy and a girl, ages 13 and 12, and she has 2 elves for them. She has searched high and low and cannot find the elves from last year.  She has said that if she can’t find them by the 5^th (which is when you are supposed to get them out?) then maybe her kids have out grown them.  It was an interesting conversation to be a part of.  How do you handle it when your children outgrow Santa?

My friend shared that she had asked her daughter if she was going to make a list for Santa of her Christmas wishes, and she got a typical pre-teen eye roll.  She asked the same question of her son and he responded “heck YEAH!”  I don’t know if his response is born of belief, or just a practical one.  If it were me then as long as Santa was bringing me gifts, I would be making lists.

I shared this story with the boys this morning and asked if they thought their friends still believed.  Matthew laughed and chimed in that he was sure his former classmate has known the truth since Kindergarten. I asked him if he was guilty of ruining his friend’s Christmas. Matthew was quiet for a while, then he assured me that he would NEVER have told anyone that Santa wasn’t real.

Yeah right.  That’s my boy, wrecking Christmas for his friends since 2001. 

Another Year

In 2013 I shared this, which was basically a repost of what I had said in 2012. 

Am I going to have to do this every year?  Today in San Bernardino CA, and other places across the world, there are families mourning the loss of their loved ones.  I hate that.

I keep trying to find words to express how this continued waste of human life makes me feel, how it is not ok that we live in a world where human life is worth so little and I’ve got nothing.

So here we are again. 

Love your family. Thank God that they are still alive.

Goodnight

Well, Crap.

Well here it is December 1 again and all I have to say is… crap. 

Listen, it is not that I am unhappy that it is the Christmas season again, because I have been waiting for it for a while.  Waiting patiently I must say, unlike some major retailers, and those people who have had their Christmas lights up since October.  I am not unhappy to hear Christmas music on the radio either, although I haven’t quite picked the XM Christmas radio station for me yet. 

I am irritated because I have a problem. It is a teeny tiny small problem that might actually become a big problem if I can’t find a way to solve it.  You see, I have this Christmas blog that you might be reading.  I have been doing it for a few years now and I blog more or less reliably all December long, updating the handful of people who read it on the entertaining things that I remember from my childhood or the clever things my kids say.  I do it for no other reason than to entertain myself.  And I only do it in December.

Which leads me to my problem.  Because I only do it in December I tend to forget which email account I use to log into the blogspot website.  Don’t laugh.  For years I used jkinkade@atbtanning.com which was my work email.  I used it because it was convenient and I didn’t have another email account that wasn’t an aol account or a shared account with Kat.  Then something happened.  Yeah, yeah, but no, not THAT something where I stopped working for them, that did happen, but not till 2013. Sometime before that the atbtanning.com account became incompatible with the blogspot.com so I had to create a new email account.  Currently I am using judsonkinkade@gmail.com for everything and you would think that was the most likely suspect as far as email accounts associated with the blog.  Guess what? That is not the correct email account.  Oh sure I can log in, no problem, but it tells me no blogs are associated with that account.

I have tried jkinkade@gmail.com, judsondk@gmail.com, jdkinkade@gmail.com and still I have nothing.  It could actually be any one of those but maybe I don’t have the password correct.  I ran into this exact problem last year, you would think I would have written it down somewhere.  Maybe I put it on a note in my phone? Let me check.

Nope. I have the XM login and password, my quiche recipe, a shopping list from 4/16/2013, Matthew’s sweet potato biscuit recipe, Paul’s lunch code from smoky hill high school in Colorado, my recipe for corn casserole, (which I did not make this year for thanksgiving), a list of who attended our Christmas party in 2010, and another list of who attended in 2014, a note about cake stands and punch bowls, but no notes about which freaking email I used.

I had this problem last year, and in the end it was Kathleen who helped me out.  I just reread December 1. 2014 entry and it says Kat helped me, but not which email account it was.  That was clever of me. Kat is busy so I am trying not to harass her, but really? What could be more important than this?

I realize the irony of the fact that if you are reading this you already know how it ends it.  Trust me, it is frustrating right now.

Oh hey! Figured it out. And yes Kat helped.  The email is jkinkade1970@gmail.com. Really? What was I thinking? Why would I put the year I was ‘allegedly’ born in my email?  I lie about my age so often it is no wonder I can’t remember that email address.

In any case, here we go again.  Happy December 1^st, thanks for being here.