What if it is not perfect?
Today I am struggling to come up with something to write about. My stomach is still iffy. I thought I was feeling better but then last night I got sick again, and would up staying home all day today. Yesterday I started a blog entry about the Kids Christmas party, but I think it sounds lame, so I shelved it for now.
Yesterday before I started feeling bad I did manage to get the tree and the ornaments up from the basement, but other than plugging the tree in, that is as far as it got. I thought maybe the boys could decorate and something magical could happen that I could write about. No such luck.
Which leads me to where we are now. What happens if all my best laid plans for something Christmassy get waylaid? What if nothing is ever perfect or clever again? I mean I realize it is not likely, but anything is possible. Sometimes it takes a lot of work to orchestrate these things, and what if the challenge of putting it all together and then remembering to blog about it later is too much for me?
I don’t pretend to be a real writer by any means. My sister Juliet? Went to school and has a masters in creative writing. She is a real writer. My childhood buddy Josh Brodesky? Wrote for the Az Daily Star and is now an Economy Reporter for the Arizona Republic. He is a writer. My College friend Rebecca Mize Harrell? Wrote for the Shawnee News Star after college. She is a writer. My friend sj Miller from HS? Wrote a book. Another writer. I am sure I know others, but those are the ones who come to mind. I am not even a real blogger like Jessica Kinney Hall or Heather Cook who do it regularly and make it look effortless. How do real writers do it?
Have I mentioned before that I get to/have to blog for work? I did a decent job for a year but then it sort of dropped off my priority list. I wonder if that is what is going to happen here? 3 years and then halfway through December 2012 I just stop.
I just asked my Matthew if it would be ok if I stopped blogging. He was shocked, SHOCKED that I would suggest that. I reminded him that he doesn’t read them, and he reminded me that he doesn’t need to, as they are ABOUT him, and he loves that. He says that is how he knows he is my “favorite”. And yes he used air quotes to say that.
Oh dear.
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I think writing with a deadline or a goal creates pressure that leads to a slowing of ideas and things about which to write. I find it easier when I write my blog for ME and not who might be reading or for any goal ("I promise to write one blog a month!") I might foolishly set for myself.
ReplyDeleteTry not to put so much pressure on yourself to write it and the ideas will probably start to flow again. Or, you can do what many bloggers do when they need a post but can't come up with anything...they invite a "guest blogger" to write something.
Hope you're feeling better soon!
Also, I do notice the pattern of spelling the odd number days and using a number for the even numbered days. Unless that pattern was accidental and I'm just showing my virgoness...
ReplyDeleteThanks Heather. Yes there is a pattern with the numbers, it was accidental than my Matthew noticed it and now I maintain it. Just like the Christmas book titles as entry titles this year.
ReplyDelete