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I have shared before that there is a point in every child's life when the melancholy creeps into the holiday season.   I shared what my good friend Daryl wrote about it in his blog here.  I know with my own sons that the line of demarcation involved grief and loss.  Unfortunately, that is often a struggle most people share during the holiday season.

My tradition of the Say their names post is partly to offset a little of that holiday grief, by remembering friends and family members who are gone.  I had a recent conversation with my sister Jennifer on this topic.  For years, her children’s tradition was for each of them to decorate their own bedrooms for Christmas, borrowing heavily from the family Christmas supply, while cultivating their own supply of holiday decorations over the years. Then on Christmas day Grampa Jerry would pick the winner, usually a 3 way tie.

In 2020, Jennifer’s oldest, age 16 at the time, opted to not decorate.  This caused Jen’s middle child to only make a half-hearted effort in her room.  Her youngest, still only 10, went all in as usual.  Since then, Jen’s youngest is still always all in on the decorating tradition, while the others have eased out.  Naomi, Jen’s middle child certainly gets a pass, as in recent years her holidays have been all about dancing in the Tucson Ballet’s production of Nutcracker.  In 2022 and 2023 she danced the role of Clara, and remains of the more popular Claras in recent years. Even though she danced in Phoenix last year, Ballet Tucson used giant sized posters of her as Clara all over town.

Last year, living in Phoenix, Naomi decorated her small apartment, and every year her collection of nutcrackers are always out at Jen’s home, or her bakery.  When it was time for Jennifer and Christian to decorate, Jennifer had pulled a muscle in her back that morning at work and wasn’t feeling up to dragging all the decorations in.  Christian told her not to worry, he would handle it.  While Jen rested on, my amazing nephew dragged all the decoration boxes into the house, put up the tree and decorated for the family. 

This year?  Jen attended big foodie event work on a Friday in early November and came home late to find Christian had decorated the entire house.  He put up and decorated the tree.  He decorated the table in the entry way.  He decorated the table they use as a hot cocoa and sweet treat station.  He decorated his own room, (although to be honest, his room stays christmas decorated most of the time).  He also found his older brother's Christmas decoration box and decorated Keenan’s room, in anticipation of his return home from college.  He set up and decorated Naomi’s tree from her apartment, and put up her bedroom decorations.  

What a Christmas surprise when Jen got home!  Christian couldn’t find the nutcrackers, but once Jen told him where they were, he got them out and put them up as well.  When Jen told me the story I made the comment that apparently, Christian hasn’t hit that line of demarcation yet.  Jennifer said that for Christian, he just LOVES the holidays.  Any holiday is an opportunity to spend time with his family, and he absolutely relishes every part of that, from the planning to the executing, and then actively enjoys the actual participation in the celebration.  I just love that nugget so very much.

Jennifer’s children’s last name is Johnson, but their entire lives, my son’s have said their cousins are 100% Kinkades because of all the similarities they share, and as a fierce declaration of how much they love them.  I have to agree that 100% Christian’s love of Christmas and joy of celebrating, certainly feels familiar.