Day 11. Texas Jay

I am telling you right now that I wasn't sure if I would be able to post this or not.  I have mentioned my friend Texas Jay before.  His name is Jay and he lives in Texas. (In case you are slow to learn and didn’t figure that from his moniker).  What can I say about Jay?  Kat calls him a small tall man. He is meticulous in his choice of stationary. My Matthew grew up thinking Jay owns Texas Roadhouse. He loves me more than his luggage.  I call him for fashion advice when I am shopping.

one does want a spot of color

I have been friends with Jay since 1999, but I haven’t actually met him in person.  He is a very good friend and today is his birthday.  I think he is turning 56 if my math is correct. ~smirk

AARP poster boy

I am blessed beyond words to have Jay as my friend.  In addition to wishing Jay birthday wishes I have been praying for Jay often this holiday season.  His mother passed away in November.  I know how difficult that loss is, and I grieve for my friend to have lost the one person to whom he was the sun and the moon.

Here in the midst of the holiday season, feeling the loss of a loved one, you have to wonder what advice do you give to help him? Do you decorate and go to parties and all that as though the person was still here?  Do you boycott everything festive because it hurts too much?  My first Christmas without my mom was also my Matthew’s first Christmas and I struggled between the extreme of doing too much and not wanting to do anything at all.  My Mother had often told me when I was thirsty to have a drink of water; meaning feel the feelings I was having in the moment, and embrace it.  When I missed her terribly, I could hear her saying “I know” and it sustained me.

So today on Jay’s birthday my message to him is the same his mother’s daily message to him “"be careful, have a safe day, eat something, call me when you can. I love you"

Consuelo Gomez Torres